Not Only Christmas Day

Lord, this is my prayer
Not only on Christmas Day
But until I see You face to face
May I live my life this way:

Just like the baby Jesus
I ever hope to be,
Resting in Your loving arms
Trusting in Your sovereignty.

And like the growing Christ child
In wisdom daily learning,
May I ever seek to know You
With my mind and spirit yearning.

Like the Son so faithful
Let me follow in Your light,
Meek and bold, humble and strong
Not afraid to face the night.

Nor cowardly to suffer
And stand for truth alone,
Knowing that Your kingdom
Awaits my going home.

Not afraid to sacrifice
Though great may be the cost,
Mindful how You rescued me
From broken-hearted loss.

Like my risen Savior
The babe, the child, the Son,
May my life forever speak
Of who You are and all You’ve done.

So while this world rejoices
And celebrates Your birth,
I treasure You, the greatest gift
Unequaled in Your worth.

I long to hear the same words
That welcomed home Your Son,
“Come, good and faithful servant,”
Your Master says, “Well done.”

And may heaven welcome others
Who will join with me in praise
Because I lived for Jesus Christ
Not only Christmas Day

— Mary Fairchild

When I found out, I cried. Then prayed for Matt, Lauren and their three kids together with my lead pastor. I’ve never met the man, and while I know many others who face cancer (and cry with and for them), I was strangely reminded of my own frailty and the weight of pastoring.

While the path is not easily, Matt and his family are modeling perspective for us. May we experience the grace to face our deepest fears daily, trusting in Christ as the sole source of our significance and strength.

• See a short video their church family saw this weekend, an update on Dec. 18th (same video as the first link)
• Also, a video from Dec. 6th, before surgery
• Matt Chandler health updates here

“All of our personal & church problems come because we don’t come continually back to the gospel to work it in and live it out.” — Tim Keller, The Centrality of the Gospel

(We work out what God has first worked in — Philippians 2:12-13)

“Most necessary it is therefore that we should know the gospel well, teach it unto others, & beat it into their heads continually.” — Martin Luther

(Let’s beat it into our own heads first — Ephesians 3:14-21; Romans 12:1-2)

A number of the kids are experiencing the fallout of a broken home: divorced, estranged or separated parents. John, one of our leaders shared how 40 years ago his parents divorced, and how at age 8 he somehow felt responsible. He then gave seven (awesome) principles for how to see yourself and others if your parents are going through something as devastating as divorce. I plan to get his notes and share on our student website, for the sake of parents.

During our discussion in break-out time (small groups), I needed to step in to lead a couple of the groups. We formed one larger group in a circle. Before I asked them questions the young ladies could ask me any question. One of their first was: what about your wife made you want to marry her?

On the spot I listed two primary reasons: she loves Christ, and she was too busy serving Him to try to flirt with me. It’s true, modesty and appropriate interaction with the opposite sex is much more attractive than being all “out there,” trying to flaunt one’s body. Seriously, ladies, guard your purity, and your brother’s purity by first pursuing beauty from the inside-out.

We chatted about other questions too, and I asked them some: since school starts this week (or next), what about middle school excites you the most? What leads you to be anxious or worry? I was surprised that not many of their answers focused on “fitting in,” or having friends. Actually, come to think of it, the enormity of peer pressure onsets a couple years later, and especially in the shift to night grade/high school.

Back to riffing about my wife … there are more than two reasons to love her.

A million reasons she’s attractive

Why is Kari so attractive to me? There are a million reasons I could list, from her mad parenting skills, to her depth of character. (On her last birthday I wrote her a card with the same number of reasons as years.) She is a wiz in the kitchen, a learner in all things, a perseverer in the direst of circumstances, an encourager when all looks hopeless, a writer of good words, a lover of simple pleasures (tea! cookie dough!). Kari is the best wife I could dream up. As the mother of our two kids she runs the house and yet finds passion and energy to devote herself to people as God leads.

My wife loves God. She is captivated with Jesus the Christ. In one hyphenated word, she is “God-centered” — more than anyone else I know. That’s why she waited for marriage, saving herself physically for me. As a single gal her keychain said “I {heart} my husband,” which of course is her Maker (Isaiah 54:5). She wisely knows I cannot fulfill her the way her true Husband can. I’m here to make her holy even more than happy (although we both know those two go hand-in-hand). As we become whole together, as one, we are happier than ever.

She is also people-directed. Kari’s passion for life and compassion for people shows itself in countless ways. Her selfless streaks extend far past our front doors. For one, her writing impacts so many. While we still have a private home life, we have a standard that given both of our buy-in, no experience is off-limits to share, if it will benefit others and make Christ look glorious. That’s because our most humiliating moments are often our greatest lessons. And the way to glory is the way of humility. Humility is not abstract; it must be learned in real-time, with real times of humiliation. In discipleship we are beckoned to share truth and faith, plus our falsehoods and un-faith, our obedience and disobedience. We learn experientially (the best kind of learning) with one another. Kari does that well, for she’s not trying to impress you or me. Christ has already impressed God for us.

Through Kari’s words others gain courage to live boldly, decide swiftly, and persevere radically. When I need a kick in the pants, I read her thoughts. Other authors teach me theology, but she shows me theology. Words about God put into daily practice.

Back in college ministry, as we were transitioning from life in Corvallis, she compiled the Bible study notes she had taught to dozens and dozens of ladies into a book (with lessons like “The Bride of Christ in Combat Boots”). I saved two copies, one for our kids to read someday, and a second copy for my own soul. Right now that copy sits on a shelf in my office, and I turn to it periodically. As a serial reader, coming back to one book is unique. Kari’s words are compelling and attractive, even in their raw form. While I may pour over a paragraph and still not get it right, Kari unleashes verbs, nouns and all the rest without so much as correcting her typos. What you read on her blog is the exact strokes of the keyboard (or “hte keboard” as she may type it).

At the most basic of level Kari is my pastor, shepherding my soul. She knows me deeper than anyone else—is not impressed—yet draws even nearer. (Can you heartily agree with me: I married up!)

While Kari is a rock, she is also real. That is perhaps her most elusive trait. How do you remain wise and discerning, yet open enough to share your life, in little and large bits? I learn that from her every day, in a million little ways. Every one is another reason to love and adore her.

(Note: this isn’t a book built for just one person. You won’t be able to “fight” alone. So, send the link to a friend, read it together and fight for one another, together, through the Gospel.)

Here’s the table of contents of Fight Clubs:

Introduction

1. Why Fight?: The Call to Fight

2. Fighting for the Church: The Failure of Accountability

3. How to Fight: Motivations for Discipleship

4. Fighting with the Church: The Three Conversions of the Church

5. Fight Club: Practical Gospel-centered Discipleship

Appendix 1: Gospel-centered Questions to Ask

Appendix 2: Gospel-centered Resources

[bio from theResurgence]:

Who is Jonathan Dodson?

Jonathan Dodson is a former window washer from East Texas, happy husband to Robie, and proud father of two children, Owen and Ellie. He is also the lead pastor of Austin City Life church and directional leader for PlantR, an Austin-based church planting network. Jonathan holds a B.A. in Anthropology and M.Div and Th.M degrees in Theology, and has published articles in various journals and webzines such as The Journal of Biblical Counseling, Boundless, Next Wave, and The Resurgence. He blogs at Creation Project and Church Planting Novice. Jonathan likes listening to Midlake and M. Ward, reading, writing, watching sci-fi, and following Jesus.

As a young man he received a promise from God, that he would become King in Israel. Yet, it took more than a decade before he would sit as King over the nation. When we consider the madness, disobedience and bad character of the current king, Saul, we sense David is clearly the better man. Why the delay? God was done with Saul, but didn’t install David for another decade. David not only watched the insanity of the king, he became the primary recipient of Saul’s jealous fits of rage and violence.

Through the next decade of trials David would learn, through the virtue of delayed gratification, that all his troubles were working for him, not against him. All of it was for his good. The same is true for all believers in Christ (Romans 5:1-5; 8:14-18, 8:28-30).

On this page the pain seems too unbearable, but if we would turn the page would could see how our story is part of The Grand Story. We do not minimize our very real suffering. But when we compare it to the magnificient glory that awaits, our perspective shifts to see God and delight in His goodness. All of it was used for our good.

• Listen to “All for Good”

No one is humble by nature. In fact, the person who appears naturally humble is usually too lazy to be ambitious or too fearful to take risks. If a person is not tempted to control, especially in a crisis, this is often a symptom of despair and fatalism. Humility comes from humiliation, not from the choice to be self-effacing or a strong urge to give others credit.

Humility that has not come from suffering due to one’s own arrogance is either a pragmatic strategy to get along with others or a natural predilection that seems to befit only a few rare individuals. For most leaders, humility comes only by wounds suffered from foolish falls.

This is the terrible secret about leadership and life: we achieve brokenness by falling off our throne. To be broken is not a choice; it is a gift. I don’t know anyone who has made the decision to be broken and achieved it as an act of the will. But to experience brokenness and humiliation, all you have to do is lead. We who lead know that things happen that make little sense and that seem to have no immediate solution yet involve some failure on our part. …

Leading others gives you the opportunity to first be caught in the crossfire of competing goals and agendas and then to deal with that crossfire with limited resources and inadequate information. Every decision you make in such adverse circumstances will be favored by some and opposed by others. And in such circumstances, someone will certainly consider you a failure. Leading invites humiliation and brokenness.

Clearly there are only three possible responses to the absurdity of leadership: control, flight, or brokenness. Given the futility of control and the uselessness of flight, the only viable option for leaders who want to mature is to embrace being broken.

—Dan B. Allender, Leading With a Limp: Take Full Advantage of Your Most Powerful Weakness, pp. 69-71 (emphasis added).

His gospel-centered emphases are water for my soul, always pointing past himself to the One who is our only Hope. A couple years ago I ran across his writings/articles on Boundless and was hooked. Fight Club looks to be a synthesis of both seeing our true enemies, and Gospel-motivated tactics. There are three simple rules for the fight clubs:

1. Know your sin
2. Fight your sin (together)
3. Trust the Savior

The church is notorious — both in anecdotes and in real life — for fighting sin as either wimps (cheap grace) or bullies (legalism). Neither will change the inner man, and both are a farce when it comes to learning to know, love and enjoy God.

(One thing I expressly appreciate about this type of resource is it is community-focused. No one can be a disciples of Jesus by himself — not even your pastor. We need one another, no matter how jacked-up we may be.)

Here’s a summary of the five chapters:

Chapter One lays out a biblical case for fighting the fight of faith, which I hope stirs you up to fight the fight of faith. Once the fighting begins, it is easy to slide into fighting people instead of sin. We start beating one another up with judgment, fighting the wrong things with the wrong motives. We fight against the church instead of with her.

Chapter Two explores where we go wrong in our fighting by uncovering legalistic and licentious patterns in discipleship.

In turn, Chapter Three calls us away from these extremes into a gospel-centered discipleship. With the gospel at the center of discipleship, we can live as Jesus intended—fighting the good fight of faith which leads to true change. However, if weren’t not careful we’ll start to fight on our own. Failure to grasp the community focus of the gospel can cut us off from the grace God gives through his people, the church.

Chapter Four reminds us that discipleship is a community project because the gospel is community focused. Jesus created and redeemed us as people in relationship, people who need one another in the fight of faith. Instead of fighting against the church, we can fight with her, to live a life that is motivated by all that God is for us in the Spirit and the Son.

In conclusion, Chapter Five offers a practical way to apply the gospel to everyday life. It is a call for Fight Clubs—small, simple, biblical, reproducible groups of people who meet together regularly help one another keep the gospel at the center of their discipleship. Fight Clubs have been crucial in my life and my church. I hope and pray that you’ll find them helpful too, that you’ll form a Fight Club and start fighting with the church, in the gospel, on mission, for the glory of God.

"On my worst days of sin and failure , the Gospel encourages me with God’s unrelenting grace toward me."

"On my best days of victory and usefulness , the Gospel keeps me related to God solely on the basis of Jesus’ righteousness, not mine."

- Milton Vincent, A Gospel Primer

Preach it to yourself daily. Start today. Preach it to others daily. Start tomorrow.

Read Jonathan Dodson’s excellent post, "Confessions of a Failing Disciple ." Here’s an excerpt from the middle:

The Gospel is for Disciples Not Just Sinners

Fortunately, Jesus is big enough for my misunderstanding of what it means to follow him. As I continued to “disciple” and read the Bible, I was struck by the fact that the disciples of Jesus were always attached to other disciples, that they lived in community. This community was authentic. They confessed their sins and struggles alongside their successes. But they also seemed to continually come back to Jesus, not merely as their example, but also as their identity, their entire sense of self. The New Testament is filled with exhortations to keep Christ at the center of our discipleship, not only for instruction but also for transformation. I began to realize that Jesus is not merely the start and standard for salvation, but that he is the beginning, middle, and end of my salvation. He is my salvation, not just when I was six, but every second of every day.

Contrary to the unforgiving demands of religion, Jesus forgives us when we fail. He doesn’t kick us when we are down, but dies to lift us up. Unlike the deception of worldly pleasure, Jesus offers true satisfaction and joy. Instead of wooing me into death, he leads me into life, his resurrection life. It slowly became apparent to me that the gospel of Christ was where I was meant to find my identity, not in impressing God or others. Refusing to share my life with others, especially my failures, was a refusal to allow the gospel of Christ to accomplish its full breadth of redemption in my life. Very simply, God was leading me into a kind of discipleship with the gospel at the center, a constant, gracious repetition of repentance and faith in Jesus, who is sufficient for my failures and strong for my successes. Jesus frees me from trying to impress God or others because he has impressed God on my behalf. I can tell people my sins because my identity doesn’t hang on what they think of me. I can be an imperfect Christian because I cling to a perfect Christ. As it turns out, the gospel is not just for sinners; it’s also for disciples, disciples who sin.

Re-read that last part (emphasis added):

Very simply, God was leading me into a kind of discipleship with the gospel at the center, a constant, gracious repetition of repentance and faith in Jesus , who is sufficient for my failures and strong for my successes. Jesus frees me from trying to impress God or others because he has impressed God on my behalf. I can tell people my sins because my identity doesn’t hang on what they think of me. I can be an imperfect Christian because I cling to a perfect Christ. As it turns out, the gospel is not just for sinners; it’s also for disciples, disciples who sin.

“True spirituality is not a superhuman religiosity; it is simply true humanity released from bondage to sin and renewed by the Holy Spirit. This is given to us as we grasp by faith the full content of Christ’s redemptive work: freedom from the guilt and power of sin, and newness of life through the indwelling and outpouring of his Spirit.”

- Richard Lovelace, Dynamics of Spiritual Life (Downers Grove, Ill.: InterVarsity Press, 1979), 19-20.

[HT: Of First Importance ]

The root problem is that we see the source of our solution as in us. It’s not. It’s in Christ, who is God come to live and die in our place. When He is our motivation, and what He did becomes the basis of what we do , then life begins to make sense, and we will be transformed in the process. Consider this:

“All change comes from deepening your understanding of the salvation of Christ and living out of the changes that understanding creates in your heart. Faith in the gospel re-structures our motivations, our self-understanding, our identity, and our view of the world. Behavioral compliance to rules without heart-change will be superficial and fleeting.”
- Timothy Keller, The Prodigal God: Recovering the Heart of the Christian Faith (New York: Dutton, 2008), 121.

In general, there may be three Gospel-distorting approaches to change:

1. Proving ourselves to God
2. Proving ourselves to others
3. Proving ourselves to ourselves

These are not in keeping with our new identity in Jesus. I’ve been continually challenged to move past this nonsense as I slowly read How People Change by Timothy Lane and Paul David Tripp, as well as look forward to Tim Chester’s forthcoming book, You Can Change .

The secret to life transformation is Gospel-centered change . As Chester puts it,

“The secret of gospel change is being convinced that Jesus is the good life and fountain of all joy.”

If sin is what we do when we’re not satisfied with God, then worship is what we do when we are satisfied with Him.

Consider 2 Corinthians 5:6-15 — I love the God-pleasing aspect of the whole thing, especially in verses 14-15 where the motivation for life is that God’s love controls us, and we make the (continual) decision to live for Him and others, more than ourselves:

⁶ So we are always of good courage. We know that while we are at home in the body we are away from the Lord, ⁷ for we walk by faith, not by sight. ⁸ Yes, we are of good courage, and we would rather be away from the body and at home with the Lord. ⁹ So whether we are at home or away, we make it our aim to please him. ¹⁰ For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each one may receive what is due for what he has done in the body, whether good or evil.

¹¹ Therefore, knowing the fear of the Lord, we persuade others. But what we are is known to God, and I hope it is known also to your conscience. ¹² We are not commending ourselves to you again but giving you cause to boast about us, so that you may be able to answer those who boast about outward appearance and not about what is in the heart. ¹³ For if we are beside ourselves, it is for God; if we are in our right mind, it is for you. ¹⁴ For the love of Christ controls us, because we have concluded this: that one has died for all, therefore all have died; ¹⁵ and he died for all, that those who live might no longer live for themselves but for him who for their sake died and was raised.

"My dear friends, most churches make the mistake of selecting as leaders the confident, the competent, and the successful. But what you most need in a leader is someone who has been broken by the knowledge of his or her sin, and even greater knowledge of Jesus’ costly grace. The number one leaders in every church ought to be the people who repent the most fully without excuses, because you don’t need any now; the most easily without bitterness; the most publicly and the most joyfully. They know their standing isn’t based on their performance."

- Tim Keller (emphasis added)

Timmy Brister, a pastor at Grace Baptist Church pointed this out in a recent post . He notes that C.J. Mahaney, in the concluding chapter of his book, Living the Cross-Centered Life , talks about the centrality of the gospel and how you never move beyond your need for the gospel.  When asked, “But don’t I need more than the cross?” , Mahaney responds thus (emphasis mine):

“In one sense, the answer is no.  Nothing else is of equal importance.  The message of Christ and Him crucified is the Christian hope, confidence, and assurance.  Heaven will be spent marveling at the work of Christ, the God-Man who suffered in the place of us sinners.

In another sense, the answer’s yes.  You do need more.  You’ve been saved to grow, to serve in a local church, to do good works, and to glorify God.  But the ‘more’ you need as a follower of Christ won’t be found apart from the cross.  The gospel isn’t one class among many that you’ll attend during your life as a Christian–the gospel is the whole building where all the classes take place! Rightly approached, all the topics you’ll study and focus on as a believer will be offered to you ‘within the walls’ of the glorious gospel.

Name any area of the Christian life that you want to learn about or that you want to grow in.  The Old Testament? The end times?  Do you want to grow in holiness or the practice of prayer? To become a better husband, wife, or parent?  None of these can be rightly understood apart from God’s grace through Jesus’ death.  They, and indeed all topics, should be studied through the lens of the gospel .”

- C.J. Mahaney, Living the Cross-Centered Life: Keeping the Gospel the Main Thing (Sisters, OR: Multnomah, 2006), 149-150.

In the morning when I put on my glasses — through which I see daily life and without which I cannot see much at all — I will again be reminded that to see the world in a way pleasing to God I must see all things through His Gospel. In fact, without that perspective I might as well be blind.

In asking whether his church could get too mature for community , he notes:

"The level of authentic confession of sin, persistent belief in the gospel, love for one another, and sharing of life and mission is remarkable. This is not naive community; it is redemptive community, a community of grace that holds in common brokenness and belief, failure and success, repentance and faith. As one of our people shared during our gathering on Sunday, “You are never too spiritually mature for community.”

Amen to that. Small/home/community/whatever-we-call-them groups should connect the weak and the strong, the mature and the newborn believer. In a very real sense, we’re all weak. Plus, I don’t think any of us really "get" the Gospel. We need it every single day, and we cannot be sanctified — changed into Christ’s image — without one another, and all that that entails.

Then Dodson asks if his church is too community-centered? He notes the happy tension:

Indeed, community should be common fare in the church, and I’m not talking about “fellowship”, just hanging out or feeling like you have friends. If we are not careful, our longing for and experience of community can subtly displace the gospel. Biblical community is much, much more than this. Biblical community is significant, not because it makes you feel significant but because it recognizes that Jesus is our common source of significance. The gospel, not people, becomes the means to the end of our identity. Our sense of acceptance flows from our relationship with Christ, which in turn frees us to love and serve one another, not secretly judge, demand or ostracize. We become a one anothering community, freed by the gospel, to love and serve each other. We are equally never too spiritually mature for the gospel.

I love it. Sweet highlights:

• "… Jesus is our common source of significance."
• "The gospel, not people, becomes the means to the end of our identity."
• "We become a one anothering community, freed by the gospel, to love and serve each other."
• "We are equally never too spiritually mature for the gospel."

As our church just focused on Colossians 3:12-17 last weekend, I resonate with the quote Dodson gives:

“We are to be teaching each other the gospel, to be correcting each other about the gospel with all wisdom, to be singing about the gospel with gratitude and so letting it dwell richly among us. When we come to church on a Sunday, or to our small group meeting during the week, we should come saying to ourselves, ‘I hope I will be reminded of the gospel in this meeting. I hope I will be taught about it and corrected in my understanding of it. I hope we will sing about it.” [Graham Beynon, God’s New Community , 119.]

That makes the Gospel central, really.

We would all do well to heed Dodson’s final exhortation:

"Does your church, your community, your small group, your missional community gather in anticipation of being reminded of the gospel, corrected in the gospel, motivated by the gospel, to sing of the gospel? If not, what can you do to reshape community expectations around the gospel, not community? Have you become too mature for community or too community centered for the gospel? Consider how to make the gospel central and community will follow."

• I encourage any leader to read Jonathan’s blog Church Planting Novice often

“God’s work in us does not eliminate our work; it enables it.  We work because he is the one at work in us.  Therefore, the fight for joy is possible because God is fighting for us and through us.  All our efforts are owing to his deeper work in and through our willing and working.”
- John Piper (still looking for in which of his books I first read this)

Here I want to point to another post , where John gives a quote from the latest edition of online journal Themelios (which is always worth a read). D. A. Carson’s editorial is largely concerned with technology. Here’s an excerpt from Carson:

"Scarcely less important than speed of access is the Internet’s sheer intoxicating addictiveness — or, more broadly, we might be better to think of the intoxicating addictiveness of the entire digital world. Many are those who are never quiet, alone, and reflective, who never read material that demands reflection and imagination. The iPods provide the music, the phones constant access to friends, phones and computers tie us to news, video, YouTube, Facebook, and on and on. This is not to demonize tools that are so very useful. Rather, it is to point out the obvious: information does not necessarily spell knowledge, and knowledge does not necessarily spell wisdom, and the incessant demand for unending sensory input from the digital world does not guarantee we make good choices . We have the potential to become world citizens, informed about every corner of the globe, but in many western countries the standards of geographical and cross-cultural awareness have seriously declined. We have access to spectacularly useful information, but most of us diddle around on ephemeral blogs and listen to music as enduring as a snowball in a blast furnace. Sometimes we just become burned out by the endless waves of bad news, and decide the best course is to turn the iPod volume up a bit." (emphasis added)

The entire article is largely a reflection on his book Christ and Culture Revisited more than a piece on pure technology. Related to spiritual life in the digital age we find ourselves wrapped in, here is the conclusion:

"I shall not here review the Christian resources God has kindly lavished on us to enable us not to conform to the pattern of this world. If we are to be transformed by the renewing of our mind, then we must be reading the Scriptures perennially, seeking to think God’s thoughts after him, focusing on the gospel of God and pondering its implications in every domain of life. We need to hear competing voices of information from the world around us, use our time in the digital world wisely, and learn to shut that world down when it becomes more important to get up in the morning and answer emails than it does to get up and read the Bible and pray . We may also learn much from church history, where we observe fellow believers in other times and cultures learning the shape of faithfulness. We begin to detect how easily the "world" may squeeze us into its mold. We soon learn that adequate response is more than mere mental resolve, mere disciplined observance of the principle "garbage in, garbage out" (after all, we are what we think), though it is not less than that. The gospel is the power of God issuing in salvation. Empowered by the Holy Spirit and living in the shadow of the cross and resurrection, we find ourselves wanting to be conformed to the Lord Jesus, wanting to be as holy and as wise as pardoned sinners can be this side of the consummation." (emphasis added)

I agree: "garbage in, garbage out" is what I used to emphasize with our college students. These days I see that not only are our youth swimming in an endless sea of triviality , but without fighting against the current, all of us adults will be swept away as well. Information does not equal knowledge, and will not automatically produce a life of wisdom, character and depth.

We must fight like heaven to fill our minds with God’s truth. So, leave this blog, turn off your computer, and enjoy God, who is the Fountain of all joy, the Satisfaction we were created to savor. Swim the depths of His infinite perfections.

“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life."

That’s shorthand for the Gospel.

Before Christ rescued me, I did not even know who John was, what the 3 meant, and especially why there was a colon before 16. When my eyes went open to see the light of the glory of Christ who is the image of God (2 Cor. 4:4-6 ), this truth became the deep end in which I have swam for twelve years now. The more I swim in it, the more I see my need for Jesus. Having been saved, I need to continually be saved, and one day look oh so eagerly to the final redemption.

Another 3:16

Another 3:16 is worth meditating on all the same. It comes into practical life in a powerful way. Let us consider James 3:16 :

"For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice."

Think about how that truth relates to leadership . Since leadership is influence, we are all leaders on some level — in our homes, in our workplaces, in public and private — is there a disorder and chaos because of my ambitions? The command denominator in all my problems is me — a truth we must each own up to. Yet Christ can move us past ourselves, compelled by His truth, beauty and love, to live above the level of ourselves. Where He is, there is no disorder, for He is renewing and recreating all things, especially us (Col. 3:10).

Let’s continually explore our own motives, check our ambitions, and remove the idols of control, allowing a free worship of God in the Gospel of grace. For the sake of others, and ourselves.

"How great a forest is set ablaze by such a small fire! 6 And the tongue is a fire, a world of unrighteousness. The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell. 7 For every kind of beast and bird, of reptile and sea creature, can be tamed and has been tamed by mankind, 8 but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. 9 With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in the likeness of God. 10 From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so. 11 Does a spring pour forth from the same opening both fresh and salt water? 12 Can a fig tree, my brothers, bear olives, or a grapevine produce figs? Neither can a salt pond yield fresh water."

Notice that portion in vv. 9 & 10. The duplicity — and power (vv. 5-8) — of our words is astonishing. We used to chant the lie, that "sticks and stones … but words will never hurt me." That’s totally false. Words are far more destructive than any object thrown. At least with sticks and stones the damage is seen, and visible reminder. Yet, words can wound far deeper, and the scars remind though hidden.

The point is illustrated deeply in my own mind as I contemplate my son’s increasing vocabulary (all dozen or so words), and think of how he said "Bible" for the first time today. Wow.

Someday he will realize the infinite worth of the Book he is talking about — I hope and pray his eyes go open as God shines His light. Yet, today, I am really his best connection to what the Bible is all about. Do I bless God, and speak of and from the Bible, and then turn around and reveal a disdain for people, for whom Christ died? He sees it when I do. And although he cannot speak in sentences, he certainly can think complete thoughts. He is arriving at conclusions about our Creator on the basis of our few hours together each day. I speak and pray in front of my son: that God is our Father. Who is Dutch’s father? Does he see a correlation, and will he desire to know this Father whom I love and know and weep at His sheer grace. Is that coming across to my son?

Kari assures me I’m doing well. Yet as a father — twice now — these thoughts weigh on me, as they should. And I hope and pray to be like my own Dad who always has joyful and pleasant words, who is a gentle man who radiates care as a father should.

Resolve to make our words personal

Can we resolve to use our words for the building up of one another?

• Have you recently harmed someone with words, even in a small way? Will you resolve to take practical, even humiliating steps, to seek forgiveness and reconciliation?
• Or, perhaps it is the other way around: How can you forgive them in love?
• Start with those you are connected to. If getting out of that rut seems insurmountable, with and the bickering, complaining and sarcasm, then start "small."
• Begin with those who may seem to be of little importance, on the fringe of your daily life — like those who pump your gas, serve your feed, and drive your kid’s school bus. We can tell a lot about a person by how he or she treats people who supposedly are not adding value to our lives. Are we adding value to theirs?
• Have you realized they may be having a worse day than you are? (Have I realized that?)

Take an interest in them, and in doing so, lose yourself in the beauty of what it means for all persons to be image-bearers of our Creator. Each one of us is marred and worse off than we realize, yet more loved than we dared imagine.

Let’s speak to one another (as made in the image/likeness of God) like we are speaking to Christ, who is The Image of God. That is how it is supposed to be.

Here are the top five lessons I (think I) have learned over this past 50 month journey and beyond. All are interconnected:

1. People are more important that what they do. Personalizing it: I am not what I do . That is, my identity is rooted in Christ, not my performance. I work from significance in Christ, not for it, as the Gospel would have it. (Repeat that last sentence with me! This message never grows old, and must be the cornerstone of a daily life. We must preach that application of the Christ’s glorious grace to ourselves every day.) In this season, I had to learn to do a few things well. To be fine with not being a perfectionist (okay, I am a recovering one). To release myself from forming a tiny view of life, all centered on me and what I am doing. I was a chronic do-er five years ago, and will never be that again, by the grace of God. Reality is, I work harder now, more efficiently, and am more content to simply BE, motivated by the Gospel.
2. Life is meant to have rhythm. Walking in step with the Spirit is a relationship worth fighting like heaven to keep vital. He is the One working in me to fulfill God’s ultimate purposes. Some people like to refer to life as being in "balance," and I probably should like that word as an engineer-type. It sounds so mathematical. Yet, it fails to see life in proper perspective, for we are not weighing things against one another (the definition of balance), but seeing them come together in harmony. Some like to pit propositional statements of faith against the story of faith. Jesus against Paul. The Bible against the Spirit. Truth versus experience. That’s utter foolishness. They are not against one another, but serve one another in love. Inexplicably connected. For example, in the Gospel rhythms, my job does not compete with my family.They are interwoven in a beautiful work of art by the Father, Son and Spirit.
3. GOD is the Gospel ( tag | search ). If there is one message I hope to bring to the local church, it is this one (along with the view that the Gospel is for all of life, even for Christians). I read the book by that title in 2006 while on hiatus from seminary (Kari was pregnant, I focused on working to provide for us). Lightning struck my soul. It is essentially 180 pages of meditation on two primary verses: 2 Corinthians 4:4,6 . Wow. All things exist and move towards the public display of God’s infinite worth (His glory). Since God Himself is the great good of the Gospel, entering into relationship like Him is like diving into a pool, not just off a diving board. As God is meant to permeate all of life, the Gospel is meant for all of life (like a living room, as opposed to simply the doorway to new life).
4. All of life is preparation. God will, as a loving Father, use every means possible shape us into the image of His Son ( Romans 8:28-30 , Hebrews 12 ). This process of sanctification (purifying) is deep and lasting, and cannot happen without pain, tragedy, relationships (including conflict and resolution) triumphs, and dependence. As a single man I began to see the need for Lamentations 3:25-33 and Habakkuk 3:17-19 become reality in my own life, asking God to shape me into the kind of man who praises Him no matter the circumstance. Doing that deep work requires preparation, which requires suffering. From a broken vertebrae that remains today, to relational brokenness, to physical pain in my feet, to disappoints of various sorts, there is no end to the design of God’s good for us through these experiences.
5. My life is meant to be wrapped about God’s story, not Him around mine. This couples with the others, and specifically #4, as God’s story is simply bigger than teeny, tiny me. That is because the Gospel is not merely good advice. It is the Good News — check that — the best news possible, that Jesus Christ, the Righteous One, died for our sins and rose again, eternally triumphant over all His enemies, so that there is now no condemnation for those who believe in Him, but only everlasting joy in God. Thus, God and His Word are the ultimate reality. I don’t apply the Bible to my life, I rather press my life into His Word, applying my life to Him. This is more than semantics, for each of us is prone to by default live for the glory of ourselves, to seek to further our own kingdom. I am a servant of King Jesus. I am part of His Kingdom. He holds the keys to the future, and I gladly submit to His leading, whatever that entails. As all good story feature conflict and resolution, the Grand Story of the Bible being played out in the universe by the Triune God is the best possible mixture of both.
6. (Just like yesterday there are six. Forgive me.) Faithfulness is our part, fruitfulness is God’s. Actually, our faithfulness is enabled by His ( Phil. 2:12-13; 1 John 5:3 ). Kari and I remind one another weekly that our home and family is the first ministry. Being faithful starts here. For whatever "success" I find in vocation, in being a pastor, in whatever, it is worthless if I fail as a faithful husband and loving father. That is the definition of success.

From these lessons I formed the chief objective of my life: To help everyone breathing know the one and only Triune God, in Christ, better than they know anyone or anything else, and to love and enjoy Him together more than anyone or anything else in all the world.

Ever a life-long learner (through all eternity), swimming in the depths of the Gospel and seeing how necessary these truths are, and looking for more to discover.

"Before you can ever make a clean and unamended confession of your sin, you have to first begin by confessing your righteousness. It’s not just your sin that separates you from God; your righteousness does as well. Because, when you are convinced you are righteous, you don’t seek the forgiving, rescuing, and restoring mercy that can be found only in Jesus Christ." (p. 22)

“Grace is for the willing and we only become willing when we confess not only the gravity of our sin, but our inability to deliver ourselves from it. Then our willingness opens to us all the sustenance of heart that can only be found in the Son.” (p. 24)
- Paul David Tripp, Whiter Than Snow (Wheaton, Ill.: Crossway Books, 2008), 22, 24.

"… give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you." ( 1 Thess. 5:18 )

What is God’s will for my life? That has always been one of most frequent questions I’ve heard, and asked. How can I know what He wants me to do, who He designed me to be?

God’s will is multi-faceted, yet He is strangely easy to please, as our caring heavenly Father. He has given some specific instructions as to what His will for us is. Trusting wholly in His Son is His direct command for all of us ( Acts 17:30; 1 John 5:13 ). Abstaining from sexual impurity, keeping our bodies for His good pleasure alone is specifically His will for us ( 1 Thess. 4:3-4 ). Add to that the heralding of His Good News everywhere by the Great Commission (Matt. 28:18-30), which of course is enabling power of God to obey the Great Commandment (love the Lord Thy God fully, more than anything else). And here in this passage we see it is God’s will that we being a praying people, continually pour out words from the depths of our being (we have incredible access!, v. 17).  Couple the next verse (v. 18): always being thankful , with always rejoicing ( Phil. 4:4 ), and we have a lifestyle that reveals God’s worth and can receive His grace.That is truly an others-directed (not me-first) Christianity.

When we think about it, that’s not too much for God to ask. In fact, He enables what He commands. This is not debtor’s ethic at play. For remember, His commandments are His enablements , just as they are not burdensome ( 1 John 5:3 ). As we continually trust in the Son, by the Spirit, we are changed into the kind of people who live out His will and purpose for us ( Phil. 2:12-13 ). We live in these commands as His people working from significance, not for it. Our performance is a measure of Christ’s ability to rescue and transform us, not something we simply have to do on our own.

Today, as it was yesterday and will be tomorrow, the will of God is for us to be thankful in all things . To specifically "give thanks" to God. Thanking Him for pain that proves we are alive, for His discipline which shows He cares as a Father, for happy times that are unearned, for frustrations and for triumphs. For a million seemingly little things. Can you join with me in doing today what — if we have been captivated by Jesus — we will love doing forever?

Our destiny is to say these small words forever

Related to giving thanks, this reminder from Of First Importance is worth re-posting…

“I have often wondered, perhaps in part simply because the term is so rarely used today, what it might mean to ‘glorify’ God forever. It will undoubtedly mean a great many things, but one of them surely must be that we will continually thank him.

We will thank him for his graciousness and goodness to us, and for inviting us into conversation. Along this line, I would think that we anticipate our ‘chief and highest end’ every time we behold something beautiful and find that after we have exclaimed, ‘Ah, how wonderful!’ we are almost compelled to say ‘Thank you!’

Our destiny is to say these small words forever and so experience the gratitude that is the perfection of happiness.”

—Craig M. Gay, Dialogue, Catalogue & Monologue (Vancouver, BC: Regent College Publishing, 2008), 48-49.

How simple, true, and profound.

Seeing that giving thanks will be our forever practice and joy for all eternity, how do we practically do that, on a day to day basis here and now?

As Warren Wiersbe reminds us:

"Sow a thought, reap an action.
Sow an action, reap a habit.
Sow a habit, reap a character.
Sow a character, reap a destiny!"

That is often thought of in a pejorative sense, as in what you sow you shall reap — badly! (see Gal. 6 ). But it also conversely true, for sowing a thought of thankfulness, does lead to action, which done repeatedly and intentionally forms a habit. This habit no longer remains merely "habitual," but becomes second nature — becoming part of our very character — and thus the trajectory we will live on. This is no positive-thinking mantra (always aimed at self). Rather, this is turning from self over and over again to see the beauty and grace of God, and reflecting his joy towards others.

(Please chime in on this…)

A few thoughts on cultivating thankfulness as a lifestyle:

• Sit down and think . We will not be grateful automatically (this depravity thing holds us back from looking outside ourselves).
  • Is there anything "big" that you’re thankful for?
  • Anything relatively "small"?
  • How do those "small" things add up — a lot of grace and undeserved kindness, huh?
• Ask someone else, "What are you thankful for?"
  • Gratitude and joy are contagious (as are negativity and self-absorption).
• Tell God what you are thankful for.
  • Go ahead, He’s listening! ( Eph. 3:13 )
• Preach the Gospel to yourself every day.
  • Can you articulate the grace of God in Christ, who is the substitution for Your sins and the only way to God?
  • We never outgrow our need for the Gospel. It is for Christians too .
• Tell someone why you are thankful for them .
  • We are each blind to our own fruit and daily need encouragement.
  • A hand-written note is a small item that can sustain a burdened soul through trying times. Take the time to show them you care, because you do. (see here )
  • God often puts different people on your heart to pray for and encourage – directly.
  • Call, write, even text (don’t "superpoke") others for to display God’s worth, their being made in His image, and for their good.
  • They might choose to return the favor, but who cares if they don’t. Be a free-grace-giver.
• Why are you/me/we generally un-thankful? (if you are not bent towards joy and gratitude, as a lifestyle or at this particular moment)
  • Remember that all problems are Gospel problems. They all stem from a lack of proper orientation to the Gospel. Put positively, the gospel transforms our hearts, our thinking and our approach to absolutely everything.
• Repeat…

Any to add?

A person with more faith would have looked at our similar meeting two weeks ago and see that as the watershed moment. It really was, and it came as kind of a surprise. That was the day I was offered the role/position of associate pastor with this particular local church. The fact that I was rejoicing then, but then fell into some patches of discouragement until it all become official, shows my own fickle nature and weakness. We fell into a little bit of despondency in the two weeks between the ministry job being offered and signing on the dotted line.

Why?

Well, for one: we are weak, as I already mentioned. More specifically, I know that an experience in recent years with a church has painfully shaped our perspective (about which you can read Kari’s retelling here , with names and places changed). To be fair, none of the church leaders acted out of malice, and while the church leaders are forgive, it is not forgotten as lessons on what not-to-do to developing leaders. It must also be said that without that season of preparation we would not be here today (nor ready for it in our character). My view of God’s absolute sovereignty and the necessity of pain in life as the great way for God to shape us have come from seasons like that in the crucible. More will come, I’m sure.

Earlier this week I was talking to my good friend Adam and mentioned feeling uneasy, like our new church leaders were somehow going to back out of the verbal agreement (a totally unfounded thought!). He stopped me in mid-sentence on the phone: "That _______ experience has scarred you, hasn’t it?" He was and is totally right. I was not voicing this pessimistic attitude publicly, but it was in my heart, and it came out in this private conversation between two close friends. Kari and I have been continually pouring out our hearts to our Great God to change us from viewing life through the lens of pain only (but a right view of suffering is key, see Romans 5 & 8). I needed his perspective.

This process has shown me that (1) my heart and mind are still in some way scarred from past painful experiences, (2) I underestimate the kindness and grace of God, and (3) He will do anything necessary to keep me from worshipping His gifts over Him (including the agonizing process of realizing I am doing just that).

Oh, how thankful I am for our new church leaders . (And our current ones, by the way, as we transition out this month.) Our reception to our new church home, among the leaders, looks to be the exact opposite of our fears. The exact opposite, almost point by point, than what took place in 2004-05. [Example: 50 months ago we arrived at our new church home in another state and ran into the senior pastor in the parking lot. He didn't recognize me nor remember our names -- "We're Jeff and Kari from Oregon," I reminded -- "Oh yeah. You're here?" -- and apparently hadn't given a thought about our coming, even though he was the one who offered me the job and had been in seemingly constant contact. Our "apartment" on the church property was still being lived in, full of trash, and no one knew we were coming, even after talking twice that previous week over the phone. Looking back we laugh at how ridiculous it was; my father-in-law shakes his head and wonders why he let us unpack the moving van; in the moment we were like deer in headlights.]

What a different picture it was yesterday , as we walked in for our meeting, all the staff popped out of their offices and welcomed us to the family — they obviously knew we were coming, more than we did! During the meeting our new church leaders talked about how they wanted to throw a couple parties to welcome us. The contrast is startling. (I am purposefully being vague and not naming the church community here — but will in the coming weeks.)

Over these two weeks we could have counseled our hearts more, specifically on the key topic Kari is delving into: Expectancy vs. Expectations and especially the Disappointment & Fulfillment Cycles . As God our Father is such a good Father and so intentionally faithful, nothing is wasted. No painful experience, and certainly not these fleeting lowly fears nor these oh so encouraging highs, will fail to serve their intended purposes in the development of our character ( Romans 5:1-5 ).

What a joy to be cared for so well. That’s why I couldn’t sleep last night. Pray for us, as there is a unique art to shaping one’s soul around the Gospel (and not it around one’s self), worshipping God and not the thing He has given .

For You, O God, have tested us;
You have refined us as silver is refined.
You brought us into the net;
You laid affliction on our backs.
You have caused men to ride over our heads;
We went through fire and through water;
But You brought us out to rich fulfillment.
(Psalm 66:10-12)

• Instant
• Constant
• Global
• Permanent

But don’t let that prevent you from speaking and writing boldly.

Even still, choose your words well.

(The list of four above was mentioned by Pastor Mark Driscoll in response to the question, "What have you learned, Mark, from those who have criticized you?" in the panel discussion at the Desiring God conference: "The Power of Words and the Wonder of God."

2. I resolve to boast only in the exultation I receive in Jesus Christ and also in the humiliation I receive for Jesus Christ. (1:9-10)

3. I resolve to set a watch over my mouth. (1:13)

4. I resolve to be constantly quick to hear and slow to speak. (1:19)

5. I resolve to learn the gospel way of speaking to both rich and poor. (2:1-4)

6. I resolve to speak in the present consciousness of my final judgment. (2:12)

7. I resolve never to stand on anyone’s face with the words I employ. (2:16)

8. I resolve never to claim as reality in my life what I do not truly experience. (3:14)

9. I resolve to resist quarrelsome words as evidence of a bad heart that needs to be mortified. (4:1)

10. I resolve never to speak decided evil against another out of a heart of antagonism. (4:11)

11. I resolve never to boast in anything but what I will accomplish. (4:13)

12. I resolve to speak as one subject to the providences of God. (4:15)

13. I resolve never to grumble. The judge is at the door. (5:9)

14. I resolve never to allow anything but total integrity in everything I say. (5:12)

15. I resolve to speak to God in prayer whenever I suffer. (5:13)

16. I resolve to sing praises to God whenever I’m cheerful. (5:14)

17. I resolve to ask for the prayers of others when I’m in need. (5:14)

18. I resolve to confess it whenever I have failed. (5:15)

19. I resolve to pray with others for one another whenever I am together with them. (5:15)

20. I resolve to speak words of restoration when I see another wander. (5:19)